Current venue - the Lightfoot Centre/Walker Dome

Between October and January our regular practice and bouting venue, The Lightfoot/Walker Dome, will be closed for some refurbishment work, so we’re looking for a new venue that could take us on during that period.

We have two regular practises each week (Wednesday 7pm – 9.30pm and Sunday 2.30pm – 4.30pm) which we will need to accommodate elsewhere for the duration of the refurbishment work, as well as two scheduled bouts:

• Saturday 20 October 2012
• Saturday 15 December 2012

On bout days we ideally need the access to the hall/space from 11am until around 5pm.

Our requirements are:

The track we use is oval and is 62 feet by 46 feet. For practises we then need additional space around the side of this of at least 1 foot.
For our public bouts we will need a hall that is 100×100 feet, including seating space for our audience. We usually bring in around 300-400 people to our bouts.

If you’re a venue owner and you think you could accommodate us, or if you have any ideas for venues that we could try, please email us at
newcastlerollergirls@gmail.com

All suggestions gratefully received!

Summer Shovin’ – Saturday 18^th August 2012 – Greenbanks Leisure Centre, Liverpool

  read more…

Summer Shovin’ – Saturday 18th August 2012 – Greenbanks Leisure Centre, Liverpool

Line-ups:

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Saturday 14th July 2012 – Walker Activity Dome

Line-Ups:

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Saturday 14th July 2012 – Walker Activity Dome

Line-ups:

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In two nail biter games at the weekend, the Canny Belters conceded the win to Manchester Roller Derby 156-172 but the Whippin’ Hinnies took the win over Kent Roller Girls 85-73.

Read the official bout reports from Stephen Kennedy:

Whippin’ Hinnies vs Kent Roller Girls & Canny Belters vs Manchester Roller Derby Checker Broads

Read an alternative report from Katy Parles:

Part 1 & Part 2

Why not paper your bedroom with our lovely poster?

Newcastle Roller Girls’ Canny Belters v Manchester Roller Derby Checker Broads

Saturday 14th July 2012

“The most important thing in the Rollympic Games is not to win but to take part, just as the most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have skated well”

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Newcastle Roller Girls proudly present – Nevermind the Back Blocks

SATURDAY 5^th MAY 2012 – Newcastle Roller Girls vs. Lincolnshire Bombers A+B

This is the Sound of the Suburbs! This is the spirit of ’77. Anarchy in the UKRDA! Whether you’re a Siouxsie Sioux or a Sid Vicious this is the place to be strutting your finest safety pins and mohawks.

Our girls will swap their Bovver Boots for Quads and will be Kicking out the Jams. The referees will be checking the girls for Brass in Pocket, and one way or another, we’ll give you a lust for life.
read more…

Saturday 21st April 2012 – Full Bout Report – Newcastle Roller Girls Whippin’ Hinnies vs Hulls Angels Roller Derby

The first of an April double-header day of action at the Walker Activity Dome, home of Newcastle roller derby, saw the home side’s Whippin’ Hinnies take on the Hulls Angels Roller Dames. Following an impressive performance in their last bout, the Hinnies were looking to build a sturdy foundation for their still relatively mixed experience group. Nothing could be further from the truth for the visitors, however, as this would be the first competitive bout Hulls Angels have played, this would be a true test of teamwork for the newly-formed outfit.

The first period got off to a steady start by the visitors, with Hull jammers MIA and Iron Giant racking up 17 points between them, as Hinnie Guinefear of Jamelot snatched 5 back. It could have been an even better start for Iron Giant, who was only limited to 10 points due to a fantastic block by Méli McSly, sending her to the back of the pack. The third jam came and introduced Hulls Eva Mean and NRG’s Anita B. Nasty, who took 7 points each, whilst the fourth saw some efficient wall-work from the visitors, tangling Tequila JacKILLina in the pack, and allowing Peggy Pistols to add up an extra 5 to their score, bringing the total to 12-29.

Cue a piece of dramatic brilliance from the home team. Guinefear returned to the track in the sixth jam to battle through an extremely congested pack, at which time Iron Giant was sent off. NRG set about outside lining, and Guinefear duly responded by easing her way round for a massive 22 point jam. The bout now meant business. Big points were hard to come by for the next few minutes, but by the eighth jam, Peggy Pistols had tipped the score in Hulls favour at 38-40, and would have made it more, had it not been for the organisation of a two-strong wall of vice-captain La Dolce Beater and McSly, which would become something of a theme for the bout. The visitors totted up a further four points in the next two jams, but a great burst through the pack by Dollface Dynamo, who shrugged off the attempts of Hulls Siege Ya Later, to pull the score close again at 42-44 by the tenth jam.

But of course, once more, things don’t go by uninterestingly for the Newcastle Roller Girls, and the eleventh jam certainly proved that. Jammer Anita B. Nasty looked to have been forced to the back of the pack, and her opposite Iron Giant was inches from taking lead jammer until a fantastic block from McSly sent her sprawling, and allowed Anita to surge through. Both jammers made several successful passes until La Dolce Beater stepping in to once more halt Iron Giant, simultaneously making a path for Anita to fly through for a very good lap; an amazing jam, bringing the score to 63-54.

Things didn’t slow down there either, as the twelfth, and final jam of the first period offered a showdown between Guinefear and Peggy Pistols. Again both jammers picked up points, before Peggy was sent to the bin, making life easier for Guinefear, who took advantage of the power jam, particularly as Hulls Fleur Rocious was also sent off, grabbing a further 13 points for the home team.

• Half time score: Hinnies 76-56 Roller Dames

The second period started much in the same way as the first, with Hulls Angels taking the ascendancy. A ten point jam by Iron Giant was swiftly followed by a further four from Peggy Pistols, who had a particularly brilliant break through the pack at the start of the second jam. However, for all their pushing, Hull were not quite able to draw level with the Hinnies, though getting as close as 77-72, where MIA was unlucky to have cut track and hand the lead status to Dollface Dynamo.

A five point gap was evidently not what the homeside had wanted, as the fifth jam gave us a display of sheer graft and determination. Indijo fought her way through the first starting pack of the entire game, taking lead just before Peggy Pistols was sent to the bin. The NRG outside line worked very well once more, allowing Indijo to add 15 points to their total before she too was sent off for a backblock on Siege Ya Later. But the action still was not over yet, as the very next jam saw Eva Mean burst through the pack, grab a few points but then get sent off for a back block on La Dolce Beater. Almost immediately, Indijo was allowed back onto the track, blazed through an unsettled Hull wall and add an extra 18 points to the cause; 110-81.

The next five jams were a much tighter affair, with neither team adding more than 13 to their total, thanks particularly to the work of pivots Tequila and Dr. Blockson. But tension started to creep into the bout at the thirteenth jam, as Dollface Dynamo was immediately sent to the floor, letting Iron Giant take the lead and making a good first pass. However, another great block from McSly meant she was prevented causing further damage, and even gave Dollface the chance to grab a few more points to boost the total to 130-105.

The final two jams were the result of tremendous hard work from the Newcastle blockers, particularly Tequila, A-Kay, McSly and La Dolce Beater, all of whom surrounded and slowed both Eva Mean and MIA down to near ineffectual levels. Only 11 more points went to the visitors, while Guinefear and Carm Like A Bomb ensured a tough-fought victory with 4 points each.

• Full time score: Newcastle Roller Girls Whippin’ Hinnies 138-116 Hulls Angels Roller Dames

 Skaters Awards:

 The Whippin’ Hinnies:

Best Blocker: La Dolce Beater
Best Jammer: Dollface Dynamo
Most Valuable Player: A-Kay

Hulls Angels:

Best Blocker: Boomtown Brat
Best Jammer: Peggy Pistols
Most Valuable Player: MIA

• Report by Stephen Kennedy

It was double success yesterday for both Newcastle teams bouting.

Newcastle Roller Girls rock solid B team, the Whippin’ Hinnies managed to keep their unbeaten 2012 streak beating Hulls Angels Roller Dames 138-116.

And our brother league Tyne & Fear brought home a HUGE win, and the biggest points differential we’ve ever seen, beating our friends North of the Border, The Jakey Bites by a whopping 536-54.

Full bout write ups and photos to follow shortly!

Photo Credit - Chris Bell

Read as our very own Rainbow Frite pops her cherry!

As Bad Reputation by Joan Jett begins to play and The Harsmallow’s skate out begins it’s easy to forget I only met my team an hour ago. It’s easy to forget my nerves and the six bottles of water I’ve already drank because my mouth is so dry from saying “is anybody else nervous?” all the time. They call my name and number and I wave to the crowd, not much taller than the girls crouched around me even with my arms in the air. 

I’m not up until the second jam, giving me time to completely freak out as I sit on the bench with my team-mates. When the whistles signal the first jam is over I head for the track. I spend approximately ninety percent of that jam stunned, watching other girls throwing hits and booty blocking like they’ve done this every day of their lives since birth. In reality both teams are equally matched but I feel like the odd one out.

Back at the bench Princess Crotchammer from  says to our line-up manager, “Rainbow is a great jammer!” I should probably be flattered but my heart sinks in absolute terror and I’m a little bit sick in my mouth. There’s a feeling that I’m sure doesn’t go away with experience – that moment when you’re on the jammer line and the ref calls “five seconds.” The pack starts rolling and everything fades away. The jammer whistle blows and I take off.

After that I’m fielded as jammer every time I’m on the track and I get more and more confident. I try not to look at the score, convinced that if I find out we are winning I might relax and if we are losing I might panic.

Our opposition, The Smackjacks, have some hard hitters – particularly Dee Tsar Star of the Wakey Wheeled Cats – and they’re relentless. Every time I get knocked down I bounce back up. Or, at least, almost every time.

There’s not long left on the clock, this is the last jam. As I plant my toe stopper on the  line the opposing jammer, Magic Beanz, shoulder checks me across the line. I panic as the ref blows his whistle, fearing a false start penalty, but he sends her to the sin bin for contact before the whistle.

It’s a power jam to The Harshmallows. We can win this, I just need to push myself. When the jammer whistle blows I break my way through the pack, twisting my ankle awkwardly. I need to keep going, to just score some more points and close the gap but it hurts. I call it off and stagger over to my bench as the ending whistle blows.

The cherry popper bout is over and my cherry has most definitely been popped. I limp around to hug everybody and I can’t stop smiling. The final score was Blackjacks 102 – Harshmallows 82 and I may run the risk of sounding cliché but it really didn’t matter who won, it was always about the experience. And besides, we didn’t lose – we came second!

Tyne and Fear vs. Jakey Bites

In a first for North Eastern England, we bring you Live Men’s Roller Derby in a double header match with NRG Whippin’ Hinnies vs. Hulls Angels Roller Dames

Newcastle Roller Girls’ brother league Tyne and Fear, will be taking on the Jakey Bites, a team of male skaters fro…m all over Scotland. Men’s Roller Derby is fast, furious and SERIOUSLY hard hitting.

Tyne and Fear will be one the of the first male derby teams in the country to headline their own bout. As if that wasn’t enough, we have a bonus double header bout between Newcastle Roller Girls’ Whippin’ Hinnies vs Hulls Angels Roller Dames.

• Venue: The Dome Walker (nee Lightfoot) , Wharrier Street, Newcastle Upon Tyne, NE6 3BR
• Date: 21st April 2012
• Time: 12:30 – Doors open
• 13:00 – Whippin’ Hinnies vs. Hulls Angels Roller Dames
• 14:00 – Half time Entertainment
• 14:25 – Tyne and Fear vs. Jakey Bites
• 16:00 – Party time!

As usual, you can come and grab a bite to eat and have some drinks with the teams at our after party sponsor venue – The WareRooms in Carliol Square, Newcastle upon Tyne. If you’re planning an overnight stay, above the WareRooms is one of our other sponsors, the EuroHostel! Contact us on media@newcastlerollergirls.co.uk for prices.

(Under 12s have the honour of free entry, however under 16s must be accompanied by an adult)

The Pack is Here! NRG are hosting a rockin’ night of music and dancing in the heart of Newcastle, to raise funds for the team.

Being a roller girl is an expensive business! If you enjoy watching us skate come home bout days, why not come along and meet us in the flesh …and help us raise funds for away games! We are holding the event to help us pay for costs we incur while travelling round the country defending Newcastle’s name in the way you know us best for, HARD and FAST!

Roller Girls don’t get paid, we’re not footballers on inflated salaries, we pay for everything ourselves, being one of the few genuinely grass roots not for profit sports in the UK.

Friday April 13th – 7.00pm
St Peter’s Social Club, Byker

Help us stay awesome! On the night there will be:

• Bands galore!
• Sven Willibefamous’ band Ball Of Mayhem
• Local gal about town Sheena Revolta and her band Women In Revolt
• The Daytona Riots
• Cake stall with take home boxes!
• Kissing and hitting booth!
• Raffle, prizes TBC
• Guess the naughtiest roller girl!

If you want to get more involved you can email media@newcastlerollergirls.co.uk

Sniper Viper models the gold on black vest

Don’t say we don’t know how to treat you right!

To celebrate Easter and the arrival of Spring, ANY order placed on the website with receive a FREE tote bag and NRG patch with our original logo. This offer is a limited time only, from now until April 13th. Click HERE to browse our merch!

Daylight Slayings – Sat 24th March – Full Bout Report – Canny Belters vs. Glasgow Roller Derby Maiden Grrders 

The skaters

Miss Wired escapes the pack - www.boutday.com

The first period of the bout saw the Belters come flying out the traps, as Miss Wired burst through a tough, slow-moving pack, going on to rack up 20 points from the off. However, the tone of the majority of the bout was set in very next jam, with Überschnell and Rogue Runner sharing a small amount of points, thanks to an extremely competitive pack. The first real threat of the impressive Sarah McMillan began in the sixth jam, where, despite again having to cope with a congested pack, she eventually managed to break into the lead and snatch five more points for Glasgow, making the score 29-12.

NRG hold the back line, the tactic which dominated the game for both sides

Things started to get a bit tasty by the eighth jam, with NRG realising the threat posed by McMillan, captain Brie Larceny stepped up to deliver an eight point jam. The lead up to her total saw Glasgow’s Moxie Blitz sent to the bin in the initial pack scramble, and a vital – not to mention huge – hit from Kalamity James on the Maiden’s jammer. NRG’s tactics proved solid as Glasgow introduced The Very Hungry Splatter Killer to the game, the Belters played a rare, very fast pack, causing a no-scoring jam, keeping the points at 40-12. Glasgow’s Fighting Torque was the next victim of NRG’s tactical awareness, when blocker Gin + Sonic checked the jammer to the very back of the pack, allowing Marie Bayonet to pick an extra four points for the home side.

Von Sleaze jamming for NRG

A more physical element came into the match by the fifteenth jam, where, with the score at 56-16, NRG were determined to stamp their authority, where Glasgow were trying to push themselves back into the contest. It was also the first significant battle of many between the respective number sevens: Von Sleaze and McMillan. It was the latter who took advantage on this occasion, making the most of a powerjam, as well as Gin, Lone Danger and Kalamity being sent to the bin at different times, pulling the score back to 62-25.

One of the major talking points of the entire bout came to the fore in jam twenty, where confusion between lead jammers caused disruption for the Belters. The jam got off to a fiery start, with Missy Pow Pow seriously slowing Fighting Torque down, Miss Wired took lead jammer, racked up thirteen points, attempted to call the jam off, removing her helmet pantie, but all four whistles did not sound, therefore losing lead jammer status. Unfortunately for NRG, the confusion caused by the misunderstanding also allowed Torque to gain eleven points, and seriously put the pressure on the Belters.

Brie, Gin and Liz hold back Glasgow's jammer - www.boutday.com

Glasgow sought to take advantage, with Rogue Runner storming her way to a twenty point power jam. However, NRG did well in limiting her damage, as Brie, Gin and Bucks Liz defied the Glasgow outline to keep the jammer down to three passes, though the score ran up to 79-72. Yet again though, NRG bounced back, with the final jam of the period, Überschnell took advantage of McMillan being sent to the bin, circling the pack for her first two passes, before taking the outside with ease on her third, eventually bumping the score up to a healthy number for the home side once more.

• Half time score: Canny Belters 104 – 75 Maiden Grrders.

Big Smack holds back Glasgow’s jammer

As the second half began, NRG were weary of Glasgow’s record of making comebacks in bouts like these, and did well to hold off their opponents for the first two jams, grabbing five more points of their own. But with the re-introduction of Fighting Torque, came a resurgence from Glasgow, as despite being wiped out in a four-player pile-up at the start of the third jam, the jammer recovered magnificently to claim twenty points, ultimately being forced to call off the jam by the persistence of Kalamity; 111-95. The next eleven jams all saw NRG build a slow, steady lead on Glasgow, with Big Smack and Fries consistently preventing extra Maiden points and Kalamity’s jamming eventually pulling the score to 129-116.

Uberschnell brings home the points for NRG

A tense few jams passed with neither team amassing more than eight points, meaning the final three jams saw the score at 137-162, and we were all set for a big finale. In the penultimate jam of the  bout, NRG poured all their effort in bringing the game to Glasgow, epitomised by Missy Pow Pow’s thunderous check on Jess E Ska, sending the jammer flying to the suicide seats. Überschnell took serious advantage and flew round the track to gloriously close the gap to 155-163.

Kalamity goes up against Rogue Runner in the final jam

With only one minute left, the final jam saw Kalamity and Rogue Runner facing off to ensure victory for their teams, but the Glasgow blockers reacted phenomenally to the pressure. Although the NRG jammer burst her way through, the pack was slowed and congested well, preventing either jammer from grabbing more than a point a piece, bringing a tense showdown to a climax.

• Final score: Canny Belters 156 – 164 Maiden Grrders.

Report by Stephen Kennedy

Skaters’ awards

NRG Canny Belters

• Best Blocker: Big Smack & Fries
• Best Jammer: Miss Wired
• Most Valuable Player: Von Sleaze

GRD Maiden Grrders

• Best Blocker: Moxie Blitz
• Best Jammer: Rogue Runner
• Most Valuable Player: Sarah McMillan

More photos

• Photo Set 1 by Idene Roozbayani Photography
• Photo Set 2 by Graeme Wharton
• www.boutday.com

Daylight Slayings – 24th March 2012 – NRG Whippin’ Hinnies vs. Furness Firecrackers

The skaters

In an exciting double-header event in March, the first bout we were treated to saw the Whippin’ Hinnies face off against the Furness Firecrackers for Daylight Slayings. Formed in Barrow in 2010, the Firecrackers are, much like NRG, rapidly building a solid reputation in the roller derby world, steadily spreading their wings to further regions of the country. The Hinnies went into this bout with a good old-fashioned mix of experienced pros and some shiny derby debuts, and it certainly made for an entertaining and rewarding game.

read more…

It was a mixed bag for NRG yesterday at their first home bout of 2012, expectations were high for the Canny Belters after a defeat in their last game, but sadly it wasn’t to be with Glasgow Roller Derby’s Maiden Grrders taking the win 164 – 156. The Canny Belters came out strong and were winning in points for the entire first  half. But with the power changing hands frequently, the balance tipped to GRD in the final few jams of the second half.

Over to the opening game, where the Whippin’ Hinnies brought Newcastle a MASSIVE home win against the Furness Firecrackers with a final score of 137 – 57 .

Full write up and picture links coming soon!!

In the mean time, Sky Tyne and Wear were in attendence at the bout and they did some interviews with Brie Larceny and Kalamity James, as well as bout footage and a hilarious appearance with a miked up Man Shaped Dog as bench coach! Check it out HERE

Your Caption Here!

Not long now until Daylight Slayings! To make the time go even faster we are giving away 2 tickets each week until the Bout for the best caption to go with our weekly pic…. this week it’s the rather celestial looking Miss Wired!

Answers on a postcard (or an email) to media@newcastlerollergirls.co.uk

Adding another sponsor to complement their current roster, Rockstar drinks will be supplying  NRG with the fuel needed to help make them champs!

Rockstar, making Newcastle Roller Girls Bigger, Better, Faster, Stronger

www.rockstarenergy.co.uk

EXCITING NEWS!!!

NRG are super excited to announce our bout sponsor for Daylight Slayings on Saturday 24th March is Greens Gym (Gosforth). We’re thrilled that an organisation so dedicated to fitness in an unintimidating atmosphere wants to be involved in roller derby. We hope this is a reflection of the level of effort that NRG put in to keeping fit and always pushing boundaries.
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Newcastle Roller Girls’ third official newbie intake gets under way on Thursday March 15th 2012 at All Saints College Sports Centre, West Denton, Newcastle, NE5 2SZ.

The sessions will run every Thursday from 19:00-21:00 and will cost £5/session.
read more…

Daylight Slayings

It’s not only the clocks that will be springing forward on the weekend of the 24th March 2012, Glasgow Roller Derby’s Maiden Grrders and the Newcastle Rollers Girls will be going double speed around track and knocking each other into Summertime in the hopes of adding a win to their names.
read more…

NRG Expo Night Wednesday 29th February!

Well hello there!

Had enough of hearing your friends/relatives/colleagues bang on about roller derby? Have no idea what it is?? Come and find out!!

NRG are holding an expo night to help celebrate the reopening of the Lightfoot in all its fancy refurbed glory and to show the locals exactly what it is we do there twice a week.
read more…

Bear and Gin and Sonic hold back Harlot and Team England player El Viscious

NRG came home without the win on 11th February, from their very exciting first bout of 2012 against Nottingham’s Hellfire Harlots.
read more…

The Newcastle Roller Girls are thrilled to announce their newest sponsors… The Ware Rooms and Euro Hostel Newcastle.
read more…

That’s right, our limited edition gold glitter shirts of our original logo, are on sale for only £8.50. Click here to be transported to our merch page *click*

Jackknife Jane jams for the Christmas CrackHers

The day was Saturday. The weather was unpleasant. The head was fuzzy. The Lightfoot Centre in Walker was still an insane-looking seventies contraption. Except about 25 degrees colder than the last time I’d been there. The reason for my voluntarily leaving the house on a cold, drizzly weekend afternoon, when I would otherwise have been reclined on my sofa taking in the day’s football news with a variety of savoury snacks? There could be only one: the latest Newcastle Roller Girls home bout.

Festive punnery abounded in the bout, cunningly titled ‘While Zebras Watched Our Blocks’. It would see two teams from Newcastle taking one another on in the opening ‘B’ team bout before the main event: a clash between Newcastle’s Canny Belters and Edinburgh’s ARRG Cannon Belles (yes, the two names are similar. Yes, I did get confused on occasion. My notes, full of abbreviations as usual, made little sense when I realised after half an hour that both teams were the ‘CBs’. I digress…)

Elizadeth Benhurt booty blocks Ellie Mental jamming for the Slay Belles

It had been a while since my brief foray into the brave new world of roller derby, and bearing in mind that foray had been, well, a bit pants really, bearing in mind it consisted a great lumbering oaf (me) trying to remain upright on four wheels, I was chomping at the bit to see the professionals in action. The atmosphere was jolly and the day started with a reminder of the rules of the sport which was a welcome relief as I’d gone a bit blurry on them if I’m honest, but I quickly remembered they involved women crashing into other women, women creating moving walls, women using one another as weapons, and similar such fun.

And so to the B team bout, which was to whet the appetite for the Christmas feast on offer that afternoon. I’d like to state how impressed I was from the outset. There is a real depth to the NRG squad now, which becomes apparent when you see they have enough skaters for two credible sides to take one another on before you even get to the main team. Also the quality of the second string skaters compared to the last time I was in attendance has vastly improved.

Sleigh Belles vs Christmas CrackHers. Just out of shot, Santa has been spotted. Naked.

That said, it was still delightfully mental. There was a lot of squawking, and some exceptional crashes and pile-ups, but aside from the odd one being caused by a person tripping themselves up, they generally came off the back of an excellent check or block, so well done those girls. Uberschnell in particular did some good jamming (check my technical terminology) picking up bucketloads of points for her team. I spent some time trying to figure out penalties but didn’t do very well. For some reason it always seemed as though the person who was wronged was sent to the sin bin rather than the aggressor. Perhaps my eyes just weren’t quick enough to register the myriad things that were going on at any one time. Or maybe roller derby takes a dim view of people tripping and getting in the way. How very dare they!

Aside from that I felt more comfortable with the rules, although I must say there was an odd-looking starting position which I didn’t quite understand, the four blockers from one team kneeling down on the start line in formation, as if they were about to have a team photo taken. It wasn’t very effective as the jammer nearly always broke loose immediately, skipping over the collection of sluggishly arising blockers and making her way to some points. The bout ended with an injury but it didn’t look too serious; the victors were the Christmas CrackHers (ba-dum tshhh) narrowly beating the Sleigh Belles. There was a bit of a love-in and then we were on our way to the main event, which followed a ‘surprise game’ involving wrapping up audience members like Christmas presents – well why not.

Bear 4CE1, Von Sleaze and Sniper Viper form an inpenetrable wall

We opted for ground level viewing, protected from the action by nothing more than a wooden barrier – it was to be like trench warfare, with glitter. The skaters from NRG took to the track to warm up looking fierce, and exceptionally thin I might add, and received a Hollywood-style introduction which was no less than they deserved. The Cannon Belles did a sort of group chant/ raindance/ meditation. The atmosphere built and we were underway.

It was a cagey start, the two teams ranked 6th and 14th respectively (the Scottish team the higher ranked) feeling each other out early on (oo-er). But there wasn’t much time on the clock before GG Fox and vice captain Von Sleaze picked up the Canny Belter’s first points, the latter taking advantage of the ‘team photo’ start adopted by the Cannon Belles, similarly ineffectual as it had been in the prior bout.

They’re canny. They’re beltin’. And oh my, are they fabulous. Hollywood entrance by the NRG girls.

GG Fox makes a break for it

I daydreamed about how cool it would be to be a jammer. I defy you to watch roller derby and not want to be one. It’s the roller skating equivalent of being head cheerleader. Or the one at karaoke who can actually sing. I mean, seriously. You get to wear a star on your helmet, and if you’re faster than your opposite number, you get your very own referee skating around the inside of the track pointing at you with his arm in the air. Your very own man telling you ‘you’re the best! Yeah!’ whilst you zoom serenely around the track, protected by a bevy of lovely ladies, picking up points for your team and making everyone cheer.

And with a wistful sigh, I’m back in the room. I’ll simply never be that cool.

The bout was noticeably more tactical than the B team affair had been, with lots of very slow starts and tense exchanges between blockers and jammers. And penalties, boy were there a lot of those! Some of them were self-explanatory, for example Von Sleaze tripping the opposition jammer when she was clean through and about to start picking up points – the equivalent of a trip in the box in football. Lucky there’s no red card. She came on and proceeded to get sent straight back off again. In fact the vice captain appeared to be carrying out some kind of bet as she amassed at least six penalties that I can recall. I wonder if she won the bet? She’s a dirty girl, nonetheless.

She’s quick, she’s hard, she’ll drop you on your arse, Von Sleeeeeaze! Von Sleaze!

Bettie BasHer takes a tumble at the hands of ARRG

Aside from all the misdemeanours there was rampant point-scoring going on, GG Fox picking up some more along with Bettie Basher, who was living up to her name and throwing some quality hits, and the Canny Belters streaked into the lead (oo-er). But shortly after, Kaos Moss picked up a bucketload of lovely points for the Cannon Belles and the visiting side clawed their way back into the bout. Then there was another intriguing blocking tactic in which the Canny Belters performed a kind of limbo. This was much more effective than ‘team photo’ start as the opposing skaters all fell over.

Captain Brie Larceny jammed her way to another couple of points and the home side crept back into the lead. In the early part of the first period the scoreline remained tight, the two teams trading the lead for a while, until the turning point came, with some minutes left in the first period (I was far too enthralled to be looking at any damn clock – there were scantily clad sportwomen zooming past my very eyes for crying out loud!), when GG Fox picked up a staggering 17 points on the powerjam to take the Canny Belters leaping into the lead by the halfway point.

Gin and Sonic up to jam

The second period was delayed due to Big Smack and Fries having some helmet trouble (oo-er). This time was passed pleasantly by the girls; there was singing and dancing on the start line and generally being friendly and such. I don’t know if it’s a case of too much ice hockey but I do wish they’d be a bit more aggressive at times. Even during altercations they remain pally and well, you know, a bit of a strop and a punch in the arm wouldn’t go amiss once in a while, know what I mean? Okay it’s official, I watch too much ice hockey. I’ll try to stop myself from yelling ‘bench clearance’ next time. Although I’m willing to bet that Von Sleaze would be up for it.

That’s not to say there isn’t physical contact. Oh no, there’s plenty. Hip checks and shoulder barges are the order of the day, and I definitely spotting some mounting going on early in the second period. Anywaaaay. Oh yes, the action. I knew I was supposed to be doing something other than talking about sporting violence and making childish euphemisms.

The Canny Belters had a commanding lead as they entered the second and the imperious GG Fox picked up even more points early on (what did they put in HER Lucozade?), followed by Bettie Basher in her incredible gravity-defying top, almost – but not quite – displaying more than just her bodacious jamming skills. Hot on her heels, Von Sleaze burst from the traps like a bullet from a gun to collect more points, taking the NRG girls’ score to over double that of their opposition and place them firmly in the driving seat (oo-er. Oh wait, that one wasn’t rude. Double entendre fail).

CAUTION: Mounting may occur at any moment. Stand well clear.

Big Smack clears the path for Bettie BasHer

The Cannon Belles’ key jammer, Kaos Moss, finally managed to chalk up a few more, despite looking a bit on the tired side (I’ll be honest, she looked wrecked, but she was being used heavily by her team so it’s hardly surprising), before NRG’s fabulous Miss Wired came into her own. Probably the best skater on the team, to these novice eyes at least, with amazing poise and speed and mind-bending balancing skills, she made fools of the opposition, FOOLS I say, to pick up 10 points in one jam and a smattering of points across a number of other jams. She’s so dreamy.

Fittingly, Captain Brie Larceny took the NRG score past the 100 mark and there looked to be no way back for the visitors. Then things started to stretch out as skaters tired; there were powerjams aplenty (remember, they’re when one team is a man down so the other has a better chance to pick up points. Nothing to do with concentrated strawberry preserves OR a rocking guitar practice session) and these seemed to change hands constantly as skaters came and went from the penalty box, keeping the seats warm (it was bloody freezing in there) and causing a constant shift of power from one team to the other. The visitors used these valuable opportunities to rack up a few more points and an unlikely comeback could have been on the cards, but even as the thought was considered the score swung back in the Canny Belter’s favour, Von Sleaze, Miss Wired and Marie Bayonet picking up enough points to surely take the contest out of reach. A last gasp opportunity for the Cannon Belles arose as three Canny Belters found themselves warming one another’s cocklese in the Sin Bin (oo-er) and a strong final jam for Kaos Moss picked up an additional 9 points but it was too little too late. The bout was over, the score confirmed at 117-84.

Beer Time!

And so it was over. It had been a journey. A deeply stylish, warm and fuzzy journey. With added innuendo. And elbows. And to the victors, the spoils. The girls and their baying fans made their way to the after party for copious amounts of festive cheer in liquid form. Here’s to a great win and another cracking afternoon’s entertainment – now onwards and upwards for the Newcastle Roller Girls.

PS Did I mention that Sniper Viper was mint? Because she so is.

Katy Parles

Taken from her blog: http://mypetsteedtangent.blogspot.com/2011/12/very-merry-rollin-christmas.html

All photos courtesy of Idene Roozbayani

Canny Belters vs. ARRG Cannon Belles - Brie Larceny attacking ARRGs wall

NRG were excited to unleash some of our newer skaters on the world with a fantastic warm up intraleague match, the Christmas Crack Hers vs. the Slay Belles, & they didn’t disappoint. A final score of Slay Belles 53 – 70 Christmas Crack Hers really got the Canny Belters in the mood.
read more…

Juicy Lucy rocks NRG logo at the World Cup

Congratulations to everyone on Team England who showed that us Brits are a derby force to be reckoned with, third place, well done girls!!
read more…

Chemic-Al keeps a close eye on Bettie

You lucky people! We have not 1 but 2 match reports for you on our recent historic away bout against the Wakey Wheeled Cats.
read more…

Juicy Lucy jamming for London Brawling against the USA's Sioux Falls

NRG are delighted to announce that they will be sponsoring the north east’s own pocket rocket, Juicy Lucy in her bid to help secure a Team England win at the Blood and Thunder Derby World Cup this week!
read more…

Sniper modelling the gold on black vest

After picking up a brand new logo earlier in the year, designed by the very talented Joanna Hall a local tattooer,  our shirts are now available to buy online! That’s right, no more waiting for home bouts (or away bouts!) in order to get your NRG goodies, they are available all year round.
read more…

Merby? Indubitably!

Santa’s little elves (Manchester Roller Derby branch) will be preparing you for the run up to Christmas with an action packed festive double header:

Mistletoe And Grime

Saturday 17th December 2011

NRG’s brave boys, Tyne & Fear, are in full tilt training frenzy for this, their first ever bout, as they take on Manchester’s mighty New Wheeled Order. This promises to be a monster merby mash-up!
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NRG is proud to announce their new sponsorship partner Rudechix – They like it derby!
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The Newcastle Roller Girls(NRG) are the newest addition to the UKRDA family, forged when like minds, athletic ability and a desire to do something different collided with an imported all-girl American sport.
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Zombie Big Smack and Zombie Bayonet smell Hot Wheel brains...

Want to hear all about our recent nail biter of a bout against Hot Wheel Roller Derby? Course you do.
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Kalamity and Brie - Stars of Facebook

Brie Larceny & Kalamity James now have their very own fan pages on Facebook! Keep up with all the latest news, photos & words of wisdom direct from skaters themselves:

• Brie Larceny Appreciation
• Kalamity James – Athlete

Skate Number: 36
Playing Since: July 2009
Likes: Speed, sunshine, space, sleeping in, animals
Dislikes: TV (esp. reality shows), politics
Positions: jammer, blocker
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Man Shaped Dog - 82

Skate Number: 82
Involved Since: Summer 2009
Positions: Pivot/Jammer/Coach/Captain of Tyne and Fear
Likes: Hanging out and being cool, core strength, playing roller derby
Dislikes: Injuries
read more…

This bootcamp is aimed at skaters in their first flush of derby love. If you’re yet to pass your minimums or are passed your minimums but yet to bout, this is the bootcamp for you!

There will be two tracks and five hours of on-skates sessions, all coached by Newcastle Roller Girls coaches and bouting skaters.
read more…

Newcastle Roller Girls have a radical bout in store for you guys with their latest event on home turf, “Thwack to the Future”.

Set your flux capacitor to Saturday, September 3, up your speed to 88mph, and let us travel through time to a fantastic double header of roller derby skills.

If my calculations are correct, you’ll see the warm-up bout at 12.30pm, as the Newcastle Roller Girls’ Whippin Hinnies take on the Sheffield Steel Rollergirls B Team.
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Skate fast, turn left

Earlier this year, we were approached by media student Mai Ngo asking if she could make a film about us as part of her course. Why the devil not, we thought. So Mai came to some practices, recorded some interviews, stalked some skaters & filmed a couple of bout. The result was Skate Fast, Turn Left & you can see it on YouTube.

Still from Skate Fast, Turn Left

Kalamity James, sponsored by The Funky Butt Club

The Newcastle Roller Girls are pleased to announce that The Funky Butt Club at the Cumberland Arms in Newcastle is sponsoring Kalamity James for our next bout, facing off against Liverpool Roller Birds, in Crouching Blocker, Hidden Jammer!

The bout, on Geordie soil, will see the NRG hitting the track to try and get a hat trick of home wins.

read more…

The duel between two sides alike in honour is named Crouching Blocker, Hidden Jammer, and will take place on Saturday 11 June 2011, at The Lightfoot Centre, Wharrier Street, Newcastle starting at 1pm.

As always with roller derby expect to see the theme take on a world of its own, with the hall decorated as a Chinese paradise, themed skate outfits and halftime entertainment, as well as plenty of cakes and crafts on sale, making this a fun day for the family.
read more…

Sweet Home Alajammer poster

Hey y’all!

Newcastle Roller Girls are pleased to announce their next home bout, Sweet Home Alajammer will take place on Saturday 7th May at a sweet lil’ ranch named The Lightfoot Centre in Walker.

The rootin’ tootin’ Newcastle lassies will be taking on those Dolly Rockit city-slickers from Leicester, for a grudge match back on Geordie soil.

Roll up at 1pm, the opening brawl will begin at 1.30, with the main shoot out at 2.30. Then join us to wet your whistle and hang up your spurs at our hoedown at Mr Lynch from 5pm!

So mount up, cos ready or not, we’re gonna skate.

Tickets £6, under 12s are FREE in, and all under 16s MUST be accompanied by an adult.

By Von Sleaze

Rollers Of The Lost Arc poster

Rollers of the Lost Arc

2nd April 2011

Glasgow’s Maiden Grrders v NRG’s Canny Belters

Arc Sports Centre

Glasgow

We’re packing the bus & hitting the North for maybe our toughest bout yet, as NRG take on Glasgow’s mighty Maiden Grrders. The Arc Sports Centre on Cowcaddens Road will be shaken to its foundations as these two tough teams of brawling bruisers battle it out.

Buoyed by their recent scorching home win against Granite City Roller Girls of Aberdeen, can Newcastle take it over the border score their 1st victory on Scottish soil? Or will they be dashed against the Maidens’ legendary walls of steel?

Get yourself to Glasgow for the clash of Clyde vs Tyne.

Keep up to speed with all our super skate shenanigans with Rollin’ News, the UK Roller Derby news site.

This extensive resource on all the UK derby juice already boasts a fabulous Flog on the Tyne bout report written by our very own Von Sleaze.

Roll on over there & enjoy.

• Captain Brie Larceny featured on Metro Radio’s Tony Horne In The Morning show.
• Real Radio plugged the bout & gave a history of skates.
• Active Newcastle made us front page news.
• BBC Sport website wrote about us too.
• Deviant magazine came to a Sunday practice (Feb 2011, p54).
• The Journal came to watch Sunday bout practice too.
• The Sunday Sun strapped on their wheels for beginners’ night.
• Chronicle Extra gave us plug too.
• Brie & Sven hit BBC Radio Newcastle.

Tickets available for £7 on the door on the day.

Bayonet makes a break for it

NRG v GCRG, March 5, 2011, Lightfoot Centre, Newcastle

NRG 113 – GCRG 63

In the run up to the bout NRG were in training overload, the panic of a first home bout in front of friends and family meant that we worked super hard, got faster, got better, and became a solid team of battling beauties.

We took on GCRG, a team similar to us, a team that we would have to work damn hard to beat, and a team that we knew wouldn’t give us an easy home win (even if we asked them REALLY nicely). The GCRG girls wore red, and wore lots of face paint. NRG wore black and lots of sparkly gold.
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and that's why Brie's captain

Jingle Belter

December 18, 2010, Lightfoot Centre, Newcastle

Radgies 67 – Tits Magees 53

Festive spirits were running high at NRG’s first intra-league bout just before Christmas.

What started as a fun idea quickly developed into a fully-fledged, action-packed drama as the self-proclaimed Radgie Rollers   and Tits Magees  battled it out for the crown of 2010′s last bout.

The Tits Magees started strong with a bumper line-up in the first few jams of super blockers and experienced jammers, making  it hard for the Radgies to get a foot, or wheel, in a game that lasted only 45 minutes with no half time.

But as the jams added up, the Radgies came out fighting hard,  their jammers really setting the track on fire, which left the Magees struggling to keep the upper hand.

The score was tight all the way through as the teams were deliberately evenly matched  but the Radgies very deservedly won   it in the end with a final score of 67-53.

It all set us off nicely for the Christmas party later on the evening at Hoults Yard – what a belter day it was!

By GG Fox

"We wish you a merry Christmas..."

Northern Roll

NRG V NUTS Home bout, Lightfoot Centre, Newcastle

NRG 102 – NUTS 81

Newcastle Roller Girls’ first ever home bout vs Northern United Team Skaters (with members from Middlesbrough Milk Rollers, Liverpool Roller Birds and Manchester Roller Derby) saw the Canny Belters pick up their second consecutive win with a final score of NRG 102 – NUTS 81. Although it was a closed bout the atmosphere was electric and the stakes still as high as ever.

NUTS were off to a great start as fans screamed from the balcony, and the half time score was 43-49 with NUTS in the lead.

The second half was ours though, with some awesome power jams seeing NRG skate out in front and take first place.

This was a particularly special win for NRG as it was the first time we have fielded a team of entirely our own players – we do love our guests, but it made the victory even sweeter. Our awesome GG Fox took home the bout’s MVP certificate for her amazing jamming skills, and for NUTS it went to MMR’s Oompah Thump-Ya!

By Big Smack and Fries

Sicily Suplex fends off MVP Oompah Thump-ya

Great Yorkshire Showndown poster

Great Yorkshire Showdown

24th October 2010

Huddersfield Sports Centre.

Leeds Roller Dolls v Whippin’ Hinnies

The Great Yorkshire show down was a great opportunity for newer skaters to get some bouting experience.
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Block The Casbah poster

Block the Casbah

25th September 2010

Parklands Leisure Centre, Leicestershire

Dolly Rockit Rollers 68 =v= 79 Canny Belters

Playing against the Dolly Rockit Rollers in Leicester, the DRR held their own and the fight was a tough one. With only a handful of points between the two teams for most of the bout, it was a real nail biter, but the Canny Belters brought home their first win!
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Those lovely folks over at BBC Tyne have featured us and interviewed our Captain, Brie Larceny.

Warming up for Smashdance, in Sheffield

NRG article on BBC Tyne

July 24th 2010, at Ponds Forge in Sheffield.

Final score: SSRG 150 – NRG 73

Smashdance poster

Smashdance post bout group photo!

Ditching heels for wheels

The Journal published a lovely double page article us this week.

Read all about it.

2 whole pages